“Grammy, Mom said she hates you.” Those words struck my heart. At 6-years-old, my stepdaughter knew that her mom hated her grandmother, my husband’s mother, and worried about the impact of that relationship on her mom’s happiness.The evidence of this loyalty bind was abundant when we would spend the day with Grammy. Their nightly phone calls to their mom would pointedly leave out any ... Read the Post
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The Ours Baby Perspective: Lessons From Potty Training
Since before she was born, I’ve been worried about how our “ours” daughter would grow up having a half sibling that didn’t live with us. I've considered the ours baby perspective tirelessly.Will she feel like we spoil my stepdaughter when she’s here?Are we going to deprive her of experiences because my stepdaughter isn’t here all of the time?Is there going to be resentment or ... Read the Post
Why Stepmoms Should Do Nothing. And Five Steps To Get There.
Yesterday, I changed my sheets. That was my big accomplishment for the day. Yes, in this new world of social distancing and quarantines, where I now have all the time in the world to stepmom and to tackle projects, I changed my sheets. And I am totally okay with that. Why? Because I’ve discovered a secret: doing nothing actually helps us do more. Let’s ... Read the Post
6 Tips for your First Mother’s Day as a Stepmom
I vividly remember my first Mother's Day as a stepmom. I felt left-out, unappreciated, and disappointed.It seemed entirely unfair that I would help to raise my stepdaughter and wouldn't receive recognition for that contribution from so many in my life. I could perform many of the same tasks as a "real mom," but still, Mother's Day was reserved for them instead of me.Even though I can ... Read the Post
When the Ex Won’t Stop Bad-Mouthing You
"Love your kids more than you hate your ex!" It should be a logical conclusion instead of a desperate plea, and yet, here we are.Some stepmoms find themselves stuck in a co-parenting dynamic with an ex who won't stop bad-mouthing the stepmom and/or her partner to the kids, the in-laws, online, or to anyone who will listen.So, what's a stepmom to do? Can you correct the bad-mouthing? Is it ... Read the Post