This article first appeared on stepqueen.com and has been reprinted here with permission.
It is without a doubt that I can tell you this: being a stepmom has been one of the most challenging, most confusing, and highly emotional roller coasters that I’ve ever been on in my life.
Thankfully, my partner, their ex, their son (my stepson), and I have come to a place where we have a very limited amount of conflict within our family. It took some serious work and some professional help, but I can honestly say that we all love each other unconditionally.
And the mom and I, well, we don’t love each other, but we are definitely friendly. This past Mother’s Day, she even sent me a gift. How nice!
Since my darker stepmom days, I have become a Stepfamily Foundation Certified Counselor, and am so blessed to be able to help women who are in the lonely and tumultuous place that I was in only a few short years ago. Now, generally, I like to keep things on a positive note. But, as with all things in life, there are 2 sides to every coin.
As much as I love my partner, I wish that they had known these 5 things when I first became the stepmother. And so for you, Stepqueen, I am writing this today, in hopes that your partner will accidentally stumble across it because it maybe didn’t get closed on the iPad you left in the bathroom *hint hint.*
PS: You can keep reading with this other letter to our partners.