What is your bedtime routine like? Is it chaotic or methodical? Soul-cleansing or draining? Or, worse yet, is it something you don’t even give a second thought?
How we end the evening and prepare for the day ahead is crucial to our mental health. The state of mind we’re in when we fall asleep has the potential to make or break our evening’s sleep and the following day’s mood.
Getting into a healthy bedtime routine may be the most important thing you do all year. You’ll sleep sounder, feel better, and be more prepared for the day ahead.
10 Things Successful Stepmoms do before Going to Bed
1. Snag some me time.
Whether it’s soaking in a bubble bath or enjoying a glass of wine (or both!), successful stepmoms make sure to snag some me time before bed each night. You can’t pour from an empty wine bottle, and it’s imperative you refill your reservoir each day.
Related: 45 Ideas for Me Time for Moms
2. Speak their partner’s love language.
Successful stepmoms make it a point to speak their partner’s love language each night before going to bed. They understand the foundation of a successful stepfamily is a happy stepcouple.
Related: Date Ideas that Speak Your Partner’s Love Language
Related: Gifts that Speak Your Partner’s Love Language
Related: 7 Days to Becoming a More Thoughtful Partner
3. Recite affirmations.
As stepmoms, it’s easy to feel defeated or inferior, if you let the outside influences affect you. Reciting affirmations (like these stepmom-specific affirmations!) will transform your mindset and mood from weak to confident. It will help you grow your interpersonal relationships and (most importantly!) better your relationship with yourself!
4. Meditate and/or Pray.
Clear your mind and meditate or pray before bed each day. Anna de Acosta has an entire album of incredible stepmom-specific meditations for everyone – from the beginner to the pro (Grab it here)! And Family [re]design has a bible study dedicated for stepmoms (grab the bible study here).
5. Count their blessings.
Successful stepmoms count their blessings each night before bed. They practice stepmom gratitude and are thankful for each of the blessings in their lives. This doesn’t have to be an extensive exercise – it just has to be intentional.
For example, each day, I write down 3 things I’m grateful for in my gratitude journal; they’re specific occurrences that I’m thankful for. I can’t just write that I’m thankful for my husband; a better example would be that I’m thankful my husband had a glass of wine poured and ready for me when I got home from a long day of work yesterday. It was thoughtful and just what I needed after a draining day.
Focusing on those specific examples helps us to truly focus on gratitude. I’m going to be thankful for my husband each day, but I really feel that happiness and gratitude when I hone in on a single event.
Related: Developing an Attitude of Stepmom Gratitude
6. Pick out their clothes for the next day.
The less decisions we have to make first thing in the morning, the easier our mornings will go! When stepmoms prepare their outfits the night before they’ll wear them, they’re setting themselves up for success.
7. Remind their kids they’re loved.
When my first stepmom (I’ve had 4) left my dad, she left a note and a small gift for me. In her note, she told me she loved me, and though I was only 7 at the time, I remember being really surprised by that comment. She loved me? I had no idea.
And looking back, I realize I never want my daughter to feel that way. I want her to know how proud of her I am and how very loved she is. I remind her daily all of the traits of hers I’m most proud of (she’s tenacious, persistent, generous, kind, strong) and tell her multiple times a day I love her. She is SO loved, and she should never question that.
Related: Lessons I Learned from My Stepmom
8. Resolve any issues.
Successful stepmoms make sure to resolve any issues before going to bed. They know to never go to bed angry and live by the mantra “Always kiss me goodnight.” Not to sound like a broken record, but a happy stepcouple is the cornerstone of a happy stepfamily.
9. Plan the day ahead.
Making a to-do list for tomorrow is an absolute must if you want to ensure success. Not only should the list include tasks for the day ahead, but it should highlight your three most important tasks. When your prioritization is already done when you start the day, it’s so much easier to actually do all the things. And to reiterate, the less decisions we have to make first thing in the morning, the better off we are!
10. Unplug and unwind.
Last, but certainly not least, successful stepmoms unplug and unwind each night. They put away the phones, tablets, and laptops. They focus on family, their spouses, and themselves.
I haven’t always been the best at this (and certainly still struggle sometimes!) but I try to make it a point to always put my phone away at least an hour before bedtime.
It’s never too late to start living your best life. Implement one of these strategies at a time until you master all 10. You’ll be glad you did!
PS: Check out these 5 habits of healthy, successful stepmoms.